Puddle Jumping

From the Story Arc: K MOCKBY

Previous Story in the Arc: A Shameful Secret by Red Menace (Tuesday, August 17, 2004)

Next Story in the Arc: Into Russia by Kostyak (Wednesday, August 18, 2004)

(posted Wednesday, August 18, 2004)

It was the absolute worst thing that ever happened to me. First, I’m getting ready for patrol and my brand new pair of boots have a hole in them from zombie vomit. I mean, I just got them at the big sale! Luckily, I bought three pair. So I put one of the other pair, which wasn’t even broken in yet, and went out for patrol. I’m still mad about the boots and Kost calls. “We gotta talk, now”. What a drama queen. Kostyak is ok, but sometimes he’s a little wrapped up in his own little problems. He probably wants to date me or something. I mean, it’s been building up forever. The other night we’re on patrol with Red Menace and that ass Bering Strait. So we’re chatting and stuff and it comes out that Bering’s “babushka” is a rat! A RAT! I always thought it was his grandma that died on a raft or something, but it’s a freak’n rodent! What a loser! So anyway, Kostyak is totally into me. I’m pretty sure he’s not gay like everyone says.

He’s in Kings Row, which is a totally horrible place for a first date, you’d think he’d want to go to Talos or something. There’s really great swimming there and all those islands and stuff. I finally get to his location and Soviette is there. What? Is she after him now to? Already messed up my thing with Bering…her and that damn skirt. But wait, is she crying? She’s just sobbing quietly and my heart totally breaks. Kostyak goes into the story, Mojiotok and Bestla all running away and Red Saviour letting them go and all. I can tell he’s really pissed, his fists are clenching and unclenching and his jaw is all tight…I wonder what he’s like in bed? Anyway, he keeps talking about how Saviour ordered us to stay here and I ask him, “Since when did you ever follow orders?” I see him smile and with that we’re off.

Now Mojiotok is ok, I mean he’s pretty cute for a little guy, but he never talks. Wasn’t he supposed to be a poster boy for Russia or something? I guess the Russians never heard of a spokes model. And he’s so short. They should give him platforms or something. He’s been having some sort of a problem lately; something to do with spines and blood and…oh I don’t know. It’s all very serious. Kostyak knows something about it. But Mojiotok went along with the whole transfer to Red Brigade thing so I haven’t really been paying attention to those guys. Why should I care about them?

But Bestla went to Moscow too. She’s on my team. I was really pissed about being on this team and I’m still pissed about how they did it, but I’m in Red Brigade now. And Bestla’s on my team. Sometimes I don’t know about that girl. You see her in a fight and she’s all covered in fire and fierce and yelling “BEGONE!” at everyone. Then you see her on your downtime and she’s all quiet and sad. You just feel like you have to protect her. She’s got half the guys in this outfit eating out of the palm of her hand. She doesn’t even notice. Sometimes I hate her. But I gotta help, especially since Saviours been being such a bitch lately, this’ll show her. But Bestla is my friend and the Saviour bit is just a bonus. Bestla’s on my team and needs my help.

We’ve been on this damn plane for hours. Soviette flew to Boston by herself and was going to fly out of there on another plane. Kost thought it would be a good idea to split us up. Seems kinda dumb to me, never split up the party right? But he’s a man and they got to feel like they’re in charge. He’s so tense, I didn’t want to argue with him…it’s going to be a long flight as it is. Oh ya, we’re flying in a tiny prop engine plane. These damn things were obsolete in the ‘60’s, I should know right? We’ve been on the damn thing for hours, those engines droning away. Kost isn’t saying anything and he stinks. He hasn’t changed his uniform for days.

Time for a drink. He says he doesn’t want one at first, but like any man, he can’t resist a cute girl with a fresh drink in her hand. We go though the first drink pretty slow, but then he starts really hitting the bottle hard. I keep up for a while, but it’s clear he’s got something else on his mind than what I’m thinking about. After a couple hours, my dreams of getting lucky turn into dreams of puke avoidance. He’s jabbering about Bestla and Saviour, weaving around the plane, he’s got a filthy mouth. He goes through most of a bottle of whiskey (I like some flavor in my alcohol, none of this vodka crap everyone is all on about). Then “plop”, he passes out in my lap. Sigh.

I fall asleep for a while after that. Then, the next thing I know, we’re getting ready to land in Moscow. Moscow! I thought we had to make some transfers or something! Kost is still asleep on my lap…damn, my legs are asleep too. I’m pounding on him and he just won’t wake up. What the hell am I going to do in Moscow? Kost is passed out, Soviette is who the hell knows where. I can’t deal with these Moscow people! I panic and I juice Kost. I give him a little speed shot and he’s up. He looks like hell. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone that hung over before. The juice should help his body work out the booze, but I’ve never tried this before. He looks horrible. Welcome to Moscow.