Report: Red Saviour Escapes Fifth Column
(posted Monday, May 24, 2004)
According to our comrade Petrograd, Red Saviour staged a breakout yesterday from a secret Fifth Column base. Petrograd was patrolling Steel Canyon when he saw a crowd of civilians running for safety. He inquired of one what the emergency was, and the civilian told him that a Nazi army was in the streets. There was a black-clad heroine battling them, one with a skull symbol on her uniform. Having seen the pictures from Sister Soviet's encounter, Petrograd knew it was Red Saviour battling the Fifth Column soldiers. He immediately flew in to help.
The scene he came upon was as if out of a nightmare. Dozens of Fifth Column troopers surrounded a lone dark figure: Red Saviour, still dressed in her "People's Righteous Fist of Vengeance" uniform. Petrograd attacked the troopers, drawing fire away from Red Saviour and risking his own life. A furious battle raged between the two comrades and the seemingly inexhaustible supply of Fifth Column. Red Saviour bought them some time to regroup when she blew out the supports of the building from which the soldiers issued, bringing the facade down over their heads.
Petrograd rushed to Red Saviour's side, preventing her from killing a trooper execution style. She was bruised and bloody, and swearing vengeance. Not on the Fifth Column, but on Commissar Mojiotok! She described him as a "cowardly spy" before flying off, leaving Petrograd puzzling over her words as he fled the renewed Fifth Column assault.
We believe she is capable of monitoring our broadcasts. My recommendation is that we do not leave our leadership unguarded until comrade Red Saviour can be brought back to reality.
Attached please find stills from local security cameras.