Hooray! New York! (part 1 of many)

From the Story Arc: Bestla's Diary

Previous Story in the Arc: Intimacy by Bestla (Friday, September 10, 2004)

Next Story in the Arc: Teamwork by Bestla (Saturday, February 19, 2005)

(posted Tuesday, November 09, 2004)

Dear magic diary,
I am voyaging to New York, the city with sleep problem. As you should know (aren’t you magic?) I am going there for meeting head of decadent cartoon network, who want to produce cartoon of me.
I arrive at Jfk airport, and sign every kind of funny paperwork. Good thing am very furious paperwork filler thanks all the paper general Shuai makes me compile becouse otherwise that alone could have taken one day. In this paper you have to answer lots of questions like: Are you bringing mutant vegetables in our land? Do you keep nuclear weapon in your poket? Have you recived military training and are well versed in sabotage and assassination, maybe worked even for Kgb or other secret service during the ’90? .. No, no and... no (I know lie is no good, but this was just mini lie).
After my first taxi drive I learn very important thing: New York economy is fueled by tips. This is very strange for me becouse in Ragmuffistan we’re very gelous of our change and if possible we even try to lower prices by careful and insistent contractations. So just imagine! Since I coudn’t have contractations with taxi driver on the price I feel very empty and trip to brooklin is sloppy and silent. Oh how I miss those russian taxis where you spend all the time full with the joy of lowering their prices making up story about you being only daughter of poor mother that has small pox and is going to die soon.
After arriving at my hotel in Park Slope, Brooklin, I directly go to subway, since I have all the afternoon and maybe I can go stop some crime in Manhattan, and can also see spiderman and he will be like: Wow you are Bestla, cool! And I will be like: Thee hee, and who are you?
Haha! Am so popular.

So I go to tiny cancel of subway and bumps me back. I think: is stuck, I will unstuck it. So I start wrestling with tiny cancel and soon policeman appears.
”What is it Madam?” He says and I notice is very armed and not fleeing, which is unusual behaviour if you compare with paragon policeman.
I smile using my supercuteness power and answer him: “Is no worry, I can unstuck your tiny cancel”
“Can I see your ticket madam?”
“I need no ticket, am hero” I shrug, and get back to work on cancel
“Please madam, you’re breaking it, you will need a ticket to pass, It’s two dollars”
“Have you hero discount?” I say waving in front of him my security card.
“No.”
“Can I pay in influnce?”
“No.”
“...”
“...”
“... Can I go in even if I don’t pay you two dollars?”
“No.”
“...”
“...”
“... Please?”

I go on foot. Newyorkcity 1 – Bestla 0.