CCCP High

From the Story Arc: Office Hours

(posted Monday, May 16, 2005)

“That’s it! We are hiring a tutor!” Zach walked into the room where Red Saviour was holding a meeting with other officers of CCCP. Untermensch and Communard looked at Zachary quizzically, and Soviette just laughed. The fact that Zachary Marlowe, the green skinned pointy eared “Bestial Boy”, had assumed the role of liaison to the municipal authorities was funny in the first place, but seeing him dressed in a suit and tie was too much for Jadwiga.

“Zachary…why you are wearing suit jacket and tie, but with tighty pants?” She practically fell off of her chair giggling.

“I have to get back and forth, don’t I?”, Zach growled at her. “I can’t very well be leaping from rooftop to rooftop with double pleats and a cuff!” Zach turned away from Jadwiga, pretending he couldn’t hear her continued mirth.

Natalya couldn’t resist taking her shot. “Da, I am agreeing, you definitely need a fashion tutor. We have tolerated your ridiculous clothings for too long!” Even the stern Natalya couldn’t get the line out without a grin, and Communard and Untermensch joined in the fun at Zach’s expense.

“Laugh it up romper room! I hope you guys save some energy for filling out paperwork, because I just met with City representatives in Atlas, and unless we want to be filling out all of these forms,” Zach gestured grandly over the foot high stack of papers he had dropped on the table, “we are hiring a tutor for the younger members. The city knows that we have some young new recruits, and since they are not registered in the Paragon schools, we have two choices. Either we get ourselves certified as teachers for home schooling,” Zach watched as Untermensch and Natalya wrinkled their noses at this prospect, “or we hire a tutor that has already been approved by the city.”

Communard scratched his chin thoughtfully. “This is a weighty matter mon amis, we cannot trust the indoctrination of our members to some czarist nanny with a magic umbrella. We need a tutor well versed in the history of class struggles, the inevitability of the international proletariat’s rise, and the inherent authority of the party.”

Zach cut him off before he started to get on too large a roll. “I’m sure we can just find someone like that via a want-ad. Good luck with that. More importantly, we need one that has already has his masters, has already been licensed by the city, and we need him or her to start next week, or the city will start proceedings against us for contributing to juvenile delinquency.”

Just then the communicator console on Untermensch’s belt fired off. “Heroes of the RP Congress, Professor Tempest here, I find myself needing aid to combat fascist thugs of the Council. Any assistance in this endeavor would be most appreciated!”

All the officers present knew the Professor from previous patrols, and had found him to be a very bright, upbeat, and dedicated hero, when he wasn’t working his day job as a Professor at Paragon University. But he was hardly a militant Marxist. Untermensch raised a single eyebrow, and turned to Communard. “Didn’t Professor Tempest say that he and his father was a members of the Italian Communist Party before they fled Italy?”

Communard looked skeptical about where this was headed, but nodded. “I suppose I could ensure ideological purity by monitoring his lessons with mental probes…”

Untermensch grinned and picked up his communication console. “Am on the way to be helping you comrade, but we are having something to be asking in return….”