Proof of Non-russian threat to the CCCP
(posted Sunday, July 04, 2004)
The recent clarification of CCCP membership has created much dismay among CCCP members, in itself a sign of disloyalty against the Motherland and an affront to the very spirit of the CCCP itself. However, more importantly, I will hereby bring you proof that non-Russian members of the CCCP are not to be trusted, as they pose a potential threat to our work towards the glorious World Revolution.
I shall once again mince no words. Your so called Commissar Collective Fist is in league with the enemy. Sources have tracked his downfall, ever since the publicity and public recognition of his decadent “Promotional Video” have unearthed the counterrevolutionary tendency of this despicable individual. Not only is it unacceptable to pose for video without even a mentioning of our glorious CCCP, he also failed to follow Musical Regulation Beta-Minsk, regulating the use of non-approved and decadent “rock music” in this aberration.
But more alarming are his frequent dealings with the Capitalist-Bourgeoisie Economist. As Evidence Piece 1 demonstrates, he has had frequent dealings with this enemy of the people, some sources even suggest a frequent partnership. He seems to be intoxicated not only by his large influence, but also by the Economists continuous display of power. Growing aware of our observation , he has seemingly gone into hiding.
Commissar Fist is hereby suspended from duty and labeled as Enemy of the People in the 2nd degree (treason and fraternization) . CCCP members are to engage and capture him on sight. Lethal force may be used if necessary. The subject is dangerous, even without apparent weapons and is to be treated with extreme care. Upon contact, immediate contact with CCCP leadership is to be established.
Let this be a lesson to all CCCP members! The treacherous lies and temptations of capitalism may lure all who are exposed to this decadent lifestyle, and every infection must be immediately acted upon. And by the glorious motherland, we will act.
Worker’s Champion Out