WHAAAAAT?

From the Story Arc: Red And Blue

Previous Story in the Arc: Komrad Vex: Unexpected Endgame, Pt3 by Belladonna Aura (Sunday, August 28, 2005)

Next Story in the Arc: Hacked By HiV Security Team by Belladonna Aura (Saturday, September 03, 2005)

(posted Sunday, August 28, 2005)

Bella hadn't thought much about it at the time. After Uncle Joe had been taken into cutsody and escorted to HQ, Saviour had said something about "rewarding" her for all her hard work with that particular sly and ever-so-slightly-sinister way that should have warned her....

....her darling sestra was about to reward with one hand and deliver an admonishing whack to the skull with the other, in true Soviet fashion.

No, she hadn't thought about it. It had been a hard mish with a lot of faceplanting just before. A really hard mish against DE who seemed to have learned how to hold a grudge. And who, since she was operating completely without a net in a team of considerably higher security level than she, had gotten her a fine appreciation of the carpet-flavors of Talos Island office complexes. Then add to that three EMPs to Uncle Joe....

Hadn't thought about it at all. Until she happened to glance at the roster and saw....

....the word "Official" after her name.

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT??????

After a few moments of mental running-around-like-headless-chicken, she sighed. It was too late to do anything about it. The wheels of CCCP bureaucracy were impossible to reverse.

But then---ha. A thought. A good thought. And by the deity-or-non-deity-take-your-pick, she was going to get some mileage out of this one.

And she sat down and issued her very first order as an official of the CCCP.

TO: All members, CCCP, YC
FROM: Belladonna Aura, Official, CCCP
SUBJECT: Mandatory requirement

Comrades:

I have been, as of last night, rewarded for my work in the CCCP by being upgraded to the status of Official.

My first order, in light of certain recent developments with Komrad Vex, is this.

Twice weekly, before patrol, all members of CCCP and YC will divest themselves of electronics and proceed to what was Storage Room C in the basement. Callignous Storm and I have shielded it heavily so that it could act as a shelter against an EMP Thus it will work perfectly well for my purposes, to contain an EMP.

All members of the CCCP and YC will be subject to an EMP on a twice weekly basis. Since EMP shielding is bulky, and without making room for it by removing brain-tissue wholesale, we will prevent any more Vex-like mind-control devices from being effective in the CCCP. In addition, this should also prevent any walking bombs from strolling around HQ.

This will be mandatory. Failure to comply will result in Bella tracking you down and EMPing you in your personal quarters, to the extreme detriment of your computers, stereos, and other electronic eqpuipment.

That is all.

Belladonna Aura, Official, CCCP

Your friendly neighborhood all-purpose radioactive offender

She thought a moment and then added the following.

PS. No saluting.