The lone man

From the Story Arc: Bestla's Diary

Previous Story in the Arc: Yellow ribbon, old idiot by Bestla (Saturday, July 24, 2004)

Next Story in the Arc: The lone man by Bestla (Tuesday, August 03, 2004)

(posted Monday, August 02, 2004)

Suddenly I was a child. A little child.
I remember that day, now. Since I can remember I lived with the pack, not the WC facility, the real pack.
My pack.
I was but a cub, the only one who survived during one of the worst winters the steppe have ever saw. Memories are blurred but I think the first feeling that I can remember was the sense of fear and solitude that always hunted me. When the rest of the pack went to hunt I coudn’t ever come along, and was left alone in the den; when they came back I was always the last to touch food, and so by they time they all finished and went sleeping I was left in this cold cave biting the bare bones and cracking them to suck out the marrow. Alone again.
But one day three of the Beta promised me to take me on a hunt. We didn’t have found a prey for a week and all the pack was starving. I was very excited, it was the first time I hunted for real. On the snowy barren fields I tried to blend in the earth itself to help me find some traces of the last leaving beings on that desert. The only thing I found was the remains of a human camp, probably of a lone wanderer fool enough to test his might against the cruel siberian winter. When I told the others they was utterly uninterested, but I was too stupid to understand why.

They were out for me, I was their prey for that day, enough raw meat to survive a couple of day more.
I didn’t realized that, not even when they surrounded me.
I didn’t want to belive.
But then the first, Sol Ekis, without exitation tryed to bited me, I dodged but I was desperate and felt so hollow I almost coudn’t fight back.

And then there he came.
My saviour.
First a pulsing black dot down the hill.
Then a shadowy figure, leaping like a black panther on the snow, disappearing on the last jump towards us only to reapper in front of me.
A shield between me and my death.
I could only see is black, heavy, winter cape, which streched like the wings of a dark fearsome angel.
“Run, novichok” he wispered, with a calm voice.
But I coudn’t, I was so awed I didn’t think for a moment that with him there, my life was in danger. All the pain of the fight suddenly catched up with me, and in the moment I realized I was safe, the moment I heard his voice, I passed out.

But this time it wasn’t him, it was Kostyak, with all the others, rushing to my rescue. They reached me and succesfully repelled the tsoo wave after wave, while kostyak was healing my wounds.
It just made me feel worse. Were they my friends? I was confused.
When we finished the mission I took some photos of them and realized that for good or bad, they are the closest thing to a pack I have now. I almost start crying, so left in a hurry.

I heard that Official Bering is going back to Moscow for trial. Even if we face strong opposition, and our ranks thin we have to stay close togheter, put trust in each other and endure.

When I went back to my place, I was surprised. Someone had already feeded my badger and put him to sleep. And there was a present for me! A little red pack with a yellow ribbon. I was so surprised I trashed the pack to see what was inside: A NEW PHOTOCAMERA!

“Life is a hardship, novichok. You have to endure and grow stronger.. But now rest, it was an hard day, I’ll guard your sleep”
It was his voice, behind me.